Fat-fingered and ankle-free

The fluid retention has gone to my hands and legs. All rings have been taken off, not without quite a struggle, and my socks now leave ample trench marks. Comments like “are you sure there’s not more than one in there” are starting to come thick and fast.. (sigh). My tummy profile sticks out the same as an 8 month pregnant friend of mine and my belly button is now almost all the way out.

Last week I had the glucose test. Had blood taken out of one arm, drank some flat lemonade type stuff, laid back in a big leathery/vinyl armchair and watched The Bold and Beautiful, and then had blood taken out of the other arm. Will see the ob/gyn this week and no doubt get the results. I havent had a phone call about it so I guess I’m unlikely to have gestational diabetes.

Matt says I woke him up with my snoring the other night. He had to squeeze my nose to get me to stop. I didnt even wake up though and to get through Matt’s heavy slumber and slight deafness I must have sounded like a 2-stroke mower.

I went to a work function the other night and after almost 2 years of working here certain colleagues are now interested in talking to me. It’s a pity my skillz never garnered the attention from the l33t folk, that being pregnant does. I also got sucked into the baby talk with another parent-to-be and no doubt bored the rest of the group senseless. My sincere apologies. However, as a regular cave-dweller, (happy to sit back and observe, make the occasional witty remark, and blend back into the background), it’s a little bit nice to have people approach me because they want to. Geez, I must sound like such a school yard nerd that no one likes. I’ll have you know, that is not the case. I have quite the flourishing social life and a carefully selected group of close friends and I’m quite happy with things that way.

I’m starting to get the feeling that I’m going to pop earlier than my due date. Like perhaps mid to late January. It would be a pity if I ended up with only a few days off work before the whirlwind of birth and figuring out which end is up with a new baby. But, who knows, by that stage I might be desperate for a slightly early labour.

At the ob/gyn’s this week I’ll be asking about birth plans and whether they are largely followed or not. We also have a pregnancy class this Friday night which I think is mostly about back care.

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Aprill Allen

Collector of my own bad drafts & excellent one-liners. Current painting student; Three-time B-Arts dropout.

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