An introvert’s guide to speaking in public

Things have got busy in my little world all of a sudden. Which is great, I’ve got to fund these imaginary renovations somehow, but it does mean less time for things like…well…doing nothing. I have a couple of new ongoing contracts and some other interesting professional-related things are hovering about. But what has been most occupying is the preparation for my first presentation at a seminar that I gave recently. As a self-admitted introvert, I’d never entertained such an idea until late last year. You see, there’s a little part of me that wants to be worshipped. There—I admit it. And that part of me got a little bit of exposure when I gave a brief acceptance speech at the gala awards last year. I wanted more of that. Also, the frequent flyer miles and access to airport lounges that might come along with it. But whenever someone suggested I deliver my topic to a seminar presentation, I said ‘aww, no. I don’t think I could do that’. The dilemma.

It’s March 2012 and I declared this year would be the year of speaking engagements. With one down and three more to go, I’m pretty pleased with how that plan is working out. My first ever speaking engagement was well received, made people laugh, and at least lived up to, if not exceeded, expectations. I had a lovely lady come up to me afterwards and thank me for my talk. She’d come especially for it, and I didn’t disappoint. So, I guess as a first-timer, I must have done something right. Though, I do need to work on not having to refer to my notes.

In the interests of helping other introverts to face these public speaking challenges, I thought I’d put my process here in this post.

How to speak in public like a pro. Almost.

1. Have coffee with someone who will make you commit to the seminar/conference/event in question. After they’ve nagged you about it for the tenth time in as many minutes, call or email the organiser/s of the event right in front of your coffee buddy. Now you have a witness.

2. Start preparing your material. I had 90 days to prepare, and I already had most of the material written as a white paper. I just had to turn it into slides and add some extra content to fill up the 30+ minutes time allowance.

3. Go to bed most nights with “success” or “confidence” or “public speaking” hypnotherapy apps playing in your headphones. Really.

4. Ideally, you will have been to a related event before, so you will already know people who will be there. If not, try and plan a social occasion with a few of them so you can have some friendly faces in the crowd when it’s time for you to present.

5. You will have Powerpoint open for around 80 days, continuously, and you will probably lay awake most nights having great ideas come to you for the content of your presentation. Accept it and leave those mental doors open.

6. Have a talented writer/educator friend check your slides for feedback.

7. Read books on how to give presentations and apply what you learn. Lend Me Your Ears is a good one.

8. Insert more jokes. This is dependent on your topic, I guess. But making people laugh is pretty important, especially when delivering a dry topic area, which is what seminars are typically full of. My Dad is my inspiration. He’s a bigger introvert than me, but he tells a fantastic story. Find the funny stories in your life that you could use to support your subject. Everybody has at least one.

9. Admit your insecurities to a few select fans and supporters. They will build you up.

10. Have coffee with someone who can give you some public speaking techniques.

11. Watch TED videos. Susan Cain is an introvert.

12. Rehearse. Some people say it’s better not to over-rehearse. As introverts, we need to know our material well to feel comfortable enough to share. For us, there is no over-rehearse. I felt better rehearsing to the cat, than to friends or family. I’m weird like that. I would rather deliver to a room full of mostly-strangers than to my loungeroom with my husband and kids.

13. Be like Barney. Sometimes, it doesn’t matter what anyone else says, you just feel like you can’t pull this thing off. At times like these, you need to find your inner Barney—your inner Awesome. Believe you are awesome and others will think so, too.

Because you are awesome, and people want to hear what you have to say.

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Eight is enough


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The title of this post bears little relation to the content, except that Fraser is now eight. I remember the TV show, though. Anyway. Fraser’s actual birthday was back on Feb 5. The same day and year as Facebook, as it happens. We had a little family do on the day, with lunch at the golf club and chocolate cake. We gave him another Diary of  Wimpy Kid book and golf club membership, which he’s been wanting for years. Once cricket season is over, I expect he’ll be able to start having golf lessons.

The following weekend he had a sleep over at his cousin’s house which included an outing to Luna Park, the beach, and McDonald’s. He was bribed to go on all the rides he refused to go on last time he went and declared it the best birthday ever!

Fraser wanted a birthday party this year. Given his birthday is so close to the start of the school year, and the new school, we decided to put it off until yesterday. That ended up being a great decision—the sun was shining for once—and we had a mix of old and new friends. I’d organised a few games including a scavenger hunt with little plastic jungle animals and hidden lollipops, putt putt, dizzy stick races, and had set up a target and made up a few water bombs. Most of the time though, the ten-or-so boys just kept themselves amused with cricket and soccer games.

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Once again, I slaved over making birthday cake and icing from scratch to create a Lego interpretation. It turned out so well. There was a yellow, red, and blue brick, where even the cake inside was in the appropriate colour. Why must I measure my mothering by the effort invested in the cake when it’s devoured or discarded within minutes, and the whole party goes for less time than it took me to ice it? Le sigh. I’m glad the party was a success, though.

That wasn’t it for the Festival of Fraser. He’s gone with Matt to the cricket today, watching the One Day International between Australia and India. All reports are that he’s having an excellent time.

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50/47 – School’s back

Ohhh such a backlog. So as you can see from the title, the school holidays are over and school has been back for 3 days. Fraser started year 3 at a new school this year and so we had a few tears on Monday. After being introduced to a few other year 3 boys, by another mother who was there on Monday morning, he has been playing with them and seems to have settled in ok.

Cheese & crackers

The week of camping we had planned to go up until the day before school went back ended up being a bit of a disaster. Except for the first day, it rained non-stop. There were some good things: Fraser enjoyed riding his bike around and playing cricket with some other kids and Lincoln enjoyed playing with the younger ones; Lincoln and I had a nice time at Seven Mile Beach; and the boys had plenty of swimming time in the pool at the camping ground. But overall, it wasn’t that much fun. The rain started pooling on the top of the tent and things were getting damp. So, we packed up and came home on Australia Day.

Let’s just face it; we’re cabin people.

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